Two Months

I have often pondered what would happen to a mosquito’s social life should he or she ever be sprayed with “Off.”

Would it become a social pariah? Would it be shunned? Or, would it be praised as one who had survived the Great Starvation Inducing Scent?

What makes such drama so very interesting?

I sit here tonight in the midst of my massive domain. This house sprawls and echoes with its emptiness. Yesterday, there was a party, today there was just Steph and me. Tonight, there is only me. While I am a fan of solitude at times, right now it is a bit strange.

Two months, exactly, from yesterday, is when I will be moving on. Two small months. Two months from today I may be 3,000 miles away from this country, the people I have grown to love and the life I have spent over a year living. I do not know where I will be, but I am almost certain that it will not be here. The thought brings a lump to my throat and a smile to my face.
When I arrived in this country, over one year ago, I did so with much fear and anticipation. Would I fit in? Would I have friends beyond my amazing girlfriend? Would I have fun? Would I have adventures? Would I make a difference? Would this decision to drop everything and move to Central America turn out to be the right one?

I cannot answer that last question yet, but the others are obvious. Yes, I fit right in with these crazy bastards living on the edge of life, my fellow travelers, my fellow dreamers, my fellow citizens of this planet.

Yes, I have friends beyond Steph. I have friends that I have laughed with, drank and stumbled with, cried with, discussed the universe and how life is in Georgia (the country) with. I have played and I have played hard. The friendships that have grown during my time here have been fast and reckless. Some I have known for more than a year, some I only knew for a week or two. All have left an impression upon my soul that will never be undone.

Yes, I have had fun! Be it on my own or with my crew, I have had insane amounts of fun. The kind of fun that comes with a slight tinge of danger, the kind of fun that leaves one yearning for more! The kind of fun that permeates the soul and sets a fire within it, one that will never be extinguished. I suffer permanently from wanderlust and I shall indulge it fully until my dying day, be that tomorrow, December 21, 2012 or at an extreme old age, I shall practice my citizenship of this planet to its fullest extent!

Yes! I HAVE HAD AVENTURES! From the normal, everyday adventures that come from living the life of a wanderer in the third world to the kind that only come along once every now and then and include a dead guy, this life I lead has been enriched to the nth degree by my existence in Guatemala.

Yes, I have made a difference. From the children at Safe Passage to the bar counseling sessions with friends and complete strangers, I have reached out to those who have needed me and I have given my all to see them rise above their sadness, their pain to become the Phoenix that is so very often whispered of.

As I said, the last question remains to be seen. Was it wise to cut off a blossoming writing career and sell off a life’s worth of belongings, memories, things just to come and live on a shoestring budget in the third world 3,000 miles from my own, personal shining city on a hill? Hadn’t I just spent 4 years working my name into the writing game just so? Hadn’t I just started earning enough to save, play and enjoy life? Was it wise to throw all of that away?

No, it was not wise. However, the beginnings of most adventures are rarely founded on wise ideals. History is full of men and women who chose danger over safety, adventure over normal, unwise over wise. Perhaps this will turn out to be the grandest experiment of my life. I seriously doubt it, as that would mean that I would be settling down upon my return to….wherever.

I do not know if this decision was the one that should have been made, but it was the one that was made and I must live with the consequences of that.

Last night, my home was full of good friends, good food, good drink and good conversation. If that one moment, the moment where laughter filled my home, where music filled my space and where love filled my heart, be the moment to which I look for an answer to whether this is right or wrong, the answer is right, unabashedly so.

This life is unforgiving and ever giving. This life warrants living. This life, my life, is being lived. I decided, I dropped everything, I moved and I found a whole new way to be, a whole new side to this life that has brought me memories and happiness that will not soon fall away.